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Wednesday, October 06, 2010

Blog Writing is Tough

I don't aspire to gain fame through this blog.

My days of sacrificing my family because I have something that I think the world needs to read are gone.

In leading Bible studies, the Lord graciously reminded me through MS that my family comes first...that His world, His plans for His children, are always ordered. 

My first order of business is my family. 

For years my heart was to move back to Chattanooga and go to work for Precept Ministries. I was just itching to put all the years of sales and marketing, combined with a love for the ministry and a deep desire for people to grow in Christ, to use for Him!

When the Lord did move us back here, He had already completed His work in my heart about priorities and timing, so my desires had been radically changed...by the Almighty.

To His glory.

And for the benefit of my sweet husband and precious children.

My job is here, and I know it and love it. 

I try not to spend my days counting down the time with the children, but it's hard not to...as it seems to be speeding by, way too fast! 

"Lord, help me to savor each moment."

A few months ago when I was at a ministry event, a woman whom I had deeply respected (who doesn't work for the ministry) got eyeball to eyeball with me and said these words...

"God has a higher calling for you than wife and mother."

That comment messed with me. It tainted the entire weekend for me, as I struggled to process through it.

My nights were sleepless as I took it to the Lord in prayer, believing those words to be so contrary to everything He had been working in my heart for the previous 12 months.

Really?

A higher calling?

Really?

I have friends who would insist that being a stay at home mom isn't rocket science...that they could manage it in a few hours each morning and then be bored to tears...wasting their education, their intelligence.

Oh, how I've been there!

How thankful I am that God changed my thinking! Mind you, it took years before I fully submitted to Him in this area, but I think I'm finally being obedient to Him in it.

I grieve with my friends who so want to be home with their babies, whose hearts break each time they have to leave their precious little ones in daycare...yet whose husbands insist that they work outside the home.

"Dear Lord, change their hearts. Please change them quickly. The days are ticking down. 

A harsh truth, Lord."

I pray for them. God brings them to mind so often, and I pray that He will change the hearts of their men and make them see the value, the high calling that HE places upon the role of homemaker.

I'm not talking about women who have gone to work temporarily in order to help pull through a very tight spot. 

Some of my most cherished hours are the ones spent just talking with my children...reasoning with them through life and through the Word.

A precious and dear friend of mine who has a Masters in Education told me just a few days ago that she is amazed by what I do...by how we talk with our children, and by how they are learning. 

I had no idea! All this time I thought she was anti-homeschooling. 

Oh, how that affirmation blessed my soul!

"Thank you, my dear friend! Your words were such a gift! I love you!"

What does all of this have to do with my blog, you ask?

Well, I'm rethinking it.

Or better said, I'm listening afresh.

My deepest desire for this blog has always been that you, the reader,  would be inspired to begin to study the Word of God for yourself.

So I must ask myself if my posts are pointing you that way?

Perhaps I should ask you. Are they?

Do you hunger and thirst more for the Word of God because you've visited here?

I don't desire to be the most eloquent of blog writers. Truly, you can find that on the web...women with amazing gifts of expression that will leave you bathed in the beauty of their words and their love for Jesus.

What I want more than anything in the world is for you to fall in love with your Bible.

For you to KNOW that you can study it for yourself!
For you to TRUST that you can teach it to your children.
For you to DESIRE more and more of the Living Word of God..and to grow in Christ.

How does the Lord want this to happen?

So many thoughts are swimming through my brain about it. I was awake at 2:45 this morning praying over the questions, and writing blog posts in my mind.

Today, I sit at this keyboard just pouring out my thoughts, random though they are...and asking you to pray with me.

If the Lord wants me to take this to the next level, I have to be more dedicated to meeting with you here on a regular basis. 

Will that be daily? Every other day?

I don't yet know.

Will it include  showing you by video how to teach your children to study the Word of God?

Will there be 2 days a week of deep Bible study together, and a few lighter days full of pictures and giggles?

I'm not yet sure.

But I am asking you to pray for me.

I want this blog to bring great glory to God, to equip the saints, and to be used of His Spirit to draw the lost to Himself.

If it can't do that, or isn't doing that, I need to close it.

As a blog writer, it's tough. I never know if people are reading what I write, or are just popping in for a picture and then popping right off.

It's easier when there are comments coming in, at least I know a few are reading. But when people do what I so often do on blogs... read,skim and skip, it's tough to measure whether an impact is being made for the Kingdom, or not.

So I'm asking you to pray for me...again. Did you see that? A key repeated phrase. :)

I'm not proofing today. It's 6:30 and I've been up since 2:45 and now that I've said what's been on my heart, I am going to rest my weary head.

This sleepless stuff is part of the deal when MS gets rough. It's one of my least favorite parts, but hopefully it's been used for productivity today. 

Much love to you today in Christ Jesus,
Jes



Here's one just to keep you interested. 
The family at World's End in Hull, Mass. Aren't they great?!

Raising Homemakers
It's Link-Up day at Raising Homemakers! You'll find some amazing blog writers there. Enjoy!

9 comments:

Suzanne said...

I just stumbled on your blog from Raising Homemakers. What a delightful post. I am a bit older than you I think and I am glad you learned that we have no higher calling than our role as helpmeet and homemaker. I was actively involved in womens ministry teaching studies, its a gift, but one that needs to wait. I have children from 26 to 6 and know how our time with them is so precious and goes so quickly. If your going to do in-depth studies perhaps a weekly study would work, or two days a week:-)

Sandra Heska King said...

Awesome post, Jesica. Praying for and with you.

April@The 21st Century Housewife said...

What a wonderful post! I love your insights and I felt really encouraged by it.

From Snowflakes To Hotcakes said...

Jessica - I started reading your blog a few weeks ago from Homemaking Link-up, and I'm a follower. I just wanted to let you know that I am not a stay at home mom. I am a stay at home (work from home) wife. But I read your blog b/c you inspire me to dig deeper into the Word. I hope to have children someday, but since God hasn't given them to us yet, I am trying to use this time to draw closer to Him and learn more about His word so that when the time comes, I CAN teach them about his word. I will pray for you each time I read your blog, that God would guide you. Thank you for taking the time to be candid with your readers and transparent.

Woman in the Tent said...

Obviously you should listen to God on this, Jes; but please dont take lightly the impact of your ministry here on the web. What you call random thoughts come across with a depth of Christ's love you don't often see in today's written word. You are encouraging and inspiring and I don't think you see that. I never leave your blog without having been challenged in some way, or comforted if need be. Thank you for that!

Lindsay Riggs said...

Isn't it such a blessing to understand that there is NO higher calling than motherhood? The world tells us so many negative things about "just" being a stay at home mom that simply aren't true. I'm so grateful for a husband who honors my role as mother and respects my choice and ability to be at home with our children. I know you are, too.

Stephanie said...

I love you, dear friend. I love reading your words and always know they come from your heart and from God's leading. I want you to know that your prayers are working. You know what I'm talking about.
xoxo

sharon brobst said...

Hey beautiful. Oh how I hear your heart and totally understand. Often times I wonder if anyone is reading and if I should just stop. But then I will get a comment from someone to say how I've touched them, encouraged them etc... and I think "okay God if my words can encourage just one woman I'll keep writing."

I often am encouraged my your words also, to hear your heart for God, to feel your struggles and you always point to Christ.

Dear One just be obedient to God listen to what He is telling you - you can't go wrong! :-)

I know it's already been said but I am saying it again - There is NO HIGHER calling than that of motherhood. Being a mother IS ministry!! Don't let anyone ever take that from you or make you feel less because of it.

Oh and thanks for leaving me your precious comment - unfortunately I deleted it instead of posting it! <> I can't wait to spend eternity with you either...and maybe the next time I am in Chatty we'll have to meet face to face!

Jes said...

Thank you...all of you, for your sweet comments!

You have blessed me in deep and impactful ways!

Praise God that anything I've written here has brought you encouragement!

Welcome to Suzanne (that was my favorite name ever when I was a little girl!)

and to Sandra, April and "From Snowflakes to Hotcakes" -
Welcome to each of you!

They all have blogs of their own, ladies! Check them out!

Thanks for stopping by. I hope you'll come again soon!

Love to you today,
Jes